I have a blended family of 10 children which include:
1 daughter
2 sons
1 son-in-law
1 daughter-in-law
2 stepsons
3 grandchildren (2 granddaughters & 1 grandson)
The toughest part for me as a father/dad is believing that :
I MUST get everything right
I cannot make a mistake
I cannot ask for help
I am/will be a better parent than my parents were; that I know everything about parenting because I read Dr. Spock’s book
my children are always the best behaved in their group or class or among their friends.
I can protect them from every bug, virus, plague or eventuality that life throws their way.
Mistakes
I have made many and often. One of them is not being as ‘present’ as I needed to be or always being able to materially provide in the way I wanted. Sometimes I would let my own failing get to me and manifest that in anger.
Regrets
I honestly think regret is a wasted feeling/emotion. However, there are some things I would manage differently if I had the opportunity to replay the events.
Joys
Watching my children grow to adulthood and make their own lives. Having them challenge me and thanking God for the strength and wisdom to be able to respond to those challenges with honesty and not defensively. By far the greatest joys are grandchildren – it is a completely new role & feeling that has to be experienced.
Words to the Wise
Know that as long as there is breath in your body, it is NEVER too late to say sorry for mistakes made and make amends. Remember that as a parent all you can do is ‘your best’. At the end of the day you ask yourself ‘did I do my best?’ the answer should be YES. You will NEVER be the perfect parent – there is no such thing. Everything you do with your children, do with LOVE. Remember when you were getting your backside roasted and your parents said “…this hurts me more than it hurts you…?” They were correct.